A New Year, Are you ready for a New You??

I was quite hesitant to use this title because I don’t want to make misconceptions about this article, but why not??

Most of us associate New Year’s with hopes of being a new person. Not that we’re changing our faces or names but a new perspective in life. That’s what it should be actually as that’s how we should be doing each year.

But how do we change in just a day?? Well, it may not be as instant as what we are used to now a days but believe me, every little change you do in your life would matter if you just constantly do it everyday.

Reading a book per se is one way of doing it. This book I’ll recommend ain’t a new one. You might even heard it a lot of times already and even read it. If you had, then I hope you got the gist of it like I did and had your life transformed the way you want it. If not, then hang on for the ride! You’ll be reaching your own stars, just like how you’ve specifically wished for!

We are always told to as a child to dream. It’s the only thing everyone can do, no matter what circumstance in life we’re in now, that’s sky’s the limit! Cause why not, it’s your dream and all you’ll need is your imagination, mind, and yourself. It something personal where you don’t need to think of what others dream of, just yours. You don’t care how you’ll be able to reach them or what does it takes you to reach them.

Well, that’s how The Secret by Rhonda Byrne has influenced my life since 2008 when my then bf-now hubby gave me as a Christmas gift. I can still vaguely remember that scene where he send me off in the bus terminal as I made my way back home to the province to celebrate Christmas with my family. He gave me the book in a sealed small paper bag.

photo from Amazon

I’m not the kind of person who loves receiving gifts actually as I’m not a gift giver as well. haha. (I’m just a fair person) so when he gave his gift as a surprise, all I can give in return is a kiss and hug. haha! As the bus left the terminal and I was left alone, I hurriedly opened his gift. Not knowing to expect, I was actually surprised he gave me a book. haha.

First of all, he’s a self-confessed NOT-A-BOOK person. The only books he read are those school books required when he’s still studying. Second is the title of the book, The Secret. Daunting for me when I saw it first not knowing what it is about. I haven’t heard of this book before despite loving to read books (my dad’s book collection which are the ones I usually read are actually more of the 90s famous thriller ones John Grisham kind) So having this kind of Self-development book is such a new thing for me and thrilled to have it!

My 1.5 hr trip went so quick as I got too engrossed with the book. I actually almost missed my stop! haha.. As I finished the last few pages at home, I knew it would be our topic in messages as talk back and forth throughout the holidays while we spend our time with our own families.

As the New Year of 2009 came in, we knew that our lives would be turned around. Yes! You know that inner confidence you didn’t knew you had inside and the fears of uncertainty quietly slips under the bed, too shy to come out due to your overwhelming attraction of the universe that doesn’t want me/us to be stopped.

Truly enough, our lives was turned upside down that year as despite the world going through recession that time, we braved our way to finding new and better life adventures and career. That’s been almost 10 years ago and loaded with tons of mostly highs and some lows in life, we got married, had 2 beautiful daughters, and have quitted my 9-5 job to have more time taking care of our family. Despite the very high cost of living here in Singapore, I can say that we’re among the blessed ones to be living beyond what our dreams could imagine as a single income family.

As I learned the the twist and turns of managing wisely my time as a Stay-At-Home-Mom, I now devote my time to something I advocate the most, Self-Care. As a matter of fact, I just surpassed a dream of mind that I’ve been having for sometime, read more on my last article, on how I Shared A Christmas. Okay, too much storytelling and back to this book review.

This book had made waves when it came our in the early 2000’s. A Self-help book that’s been too much talked about that they even made it into a film/ short documentary. Find any coach or mentor that advocates on self-development and they’ll surely include this book on one of your must-read.

This book focuses on the Law of Attraction and helps you change the mindset most of us grew up believing in as that’s what the society feeds us. The title “The Secret” is so captivating that it makes anyone who sees it wonder what could be in it. As a human, we all got the urge to be more curious on things especially if it’s said as a secret, don’t we. That’s the catch!

This empowering book encourages everyone to visualise themselves reaching whatever their hearts desires. It gives you that boost of motivation you’ve never even though you’ve have in the first place which makes it amazing. You just go with the flow of life as the universe seems to always be at your side making you afloat nearer and nearer to your goals, one at a time.

What I love about this though is despite it encouraging you to reach your goals, it’s strategically done the “good way”. You know, not those easy money thing or those that lead you to the wrong direction of life just to attain material wealth.

The principle you attract through the learnings you get gravitates you to give back more to others, find gratitude in small and big wins that come your way, and mainly to focus your energy to a mindset that makes you think of the good things despite any hurdles that come your way. As they say, life can be full of bumps and it’s only the way you react on every bump that makes a difference.

With this kind of mindset, no matter what circumstance is thrown into your life, you’ll always find the good on it and eventually you’ll find yourself in a good place no matter what. And you know what happens when you’re in that good disposition in life?? You do good too! So there’s no way any minute of your life would go wasted on things you’ll spend your time now and regret afterwards.

With all the great things I have to say to this book, I must also mention one controversy this book had been hit the most. Yes, I’m talking about its religious beliefs. My take on that would be from a perspective of a person who lived in Singapore, one of the most multi-cultural countries in the world, for about a decade. There’s nothing respect on each other’s belief that can’t be settled and have peace on.

Singaporeans who’s composed of 3 major nationalities, Chinese, Indians, and Malay. All of them having different beliefs and totally different cultures. But hey, see how Singapore prospers? How do they show respect to each other? Well, simply giving way to each other’s needs. Let’s take holidays and festivities for example. We all celebrate and enjoy Chinese New Year, Eid al-Fitr, Diwali, and Christmas. How cool is that!

So that’s it! If you are looking for a great book to read and am thinking to turn your life for the better this 2022, I truly recommend The Secret by Rhonda Byrne.

A Happy New Year to all!!

This post is a part of Book Marathon 2022 by https://outsetbooks.com

Astounding Insights on the Realities of Parental Pressure: A must read

(Please note that this content may contain affiliate links for product/s. If you take action(i.e. subscribe or make a purchase after clicking on one of these links, I’ll earn a small commission. This helps support the blog & allows me to create more helpful content for you. Thank you in advance for your support!)

It has been an honour to be given a chance to make a book review of the book, “The Unlikely Art of Parental Pressure“. This book has been written by respectable authors Dr. Chris Thurber and Dr. Hendrie Weisinger. With great works under their belt, I’ve got no doubt even before reading the first page that it would be an incredible, mind-opening and informative read.

True enough, my learnings from reading it went more than I expected it. While parenting in general has no rule book, reading materials where you’re given a sense of understanding whether you’re on the right path of doing things helps lessen ones worries, at least for me.

Parenting is probably one of the most important and hardest responsibility a person could have. What could be harder than being accountable for everything that happens to another person’s life. Not that parent’s are in control of their children’s life all through out their life but it is the parent’s who is in charge of a child especially during their prime years when their character and personality is still being moulded. This I may say is a very important aspect in someone’s life as whatever experience is learned during this childhood years is usually brought and can affect their adult life.

Together with the happiness and joy a child brings, not even before the time they see each other in person, but from the first time the parents hear their child’s heart beat is already an unexplainable episode in a parent’s life. Having experienced it twice in my life, I still got no words to describe how it feels, just thinking about it. That special moment happened to me and my hubby 6 and 7 years ago. Up until today, our daughters provide priceless bliss to our lives and gives us a purpose to always look forward to each and every waking day.

Let’s get real though, the stress they give everyday since they were born is also something!haha. Only parents/ guardians would know how much sacrifice it takes to raise a child. From the changes it brings to you physically (especially moms) to the emotional stress and let’s not forget how much raising a child challenges each parent financially. All of this for the love of a parent to their child. Whew!

I’m happy to say that gone are those sleepless nights for us. We get to joke around nowadays how exhausting it is to change nappies and prepare milk. We may be graduates of that phase already but that doesn’t mean we’re done. Nowadays, these two rascals fill our days with their quirkiness. Nursery rhymes turned to Disney and Nickelodeon shows where they expect us to memories songs like them. As they step up to their Primary education, were slowly setting our minds already that our lives would be filled with school homework and exams.

Being a parent never ends and never gets easy. It just evolves from one thing to another as your child goes through different phases of childhood. Nevertheless, each one only ain’t just a hard task but a joyful memory as well that every parent would remember all through their lives.

This newly released book, “The Unlikely Art of Parental Pressure”, gives parents and insight of what is really happening in the world of parenthood. As always, you don’t realise much what you are doing or rather give more thought to what you are into when your head is on the game. It’s only when you go out of the arena, watch from the outside and see the better picture that it becomes more clearer if what you’ve been doing is good or bad, helpful or not.

Truly there’s a lot of ways parenting can be made. Sticking to the main goal which is to bring out the best from our children for them to be better prepared for their future may always be in mind. Since there’s a very thin line dividing the interest of parents as well, most parents fall into the pit of unintentionally pressuring their children without them knowing. Books like this can help us better do our job.

Everyone’s life has been shaken since the Pandemic. As if life isn’t hard already, the challenge to keep afloat even became harder. Not only is every parent expected to adapt quickly to a new era and ways to do things (work from home) but also to help their children live with it too (homeschooling).

This time couldn’t be any sweeter if we think of it as a way for families to finally spend time with each other. It’s no secret that life has taken toll on all of us and we’ve been living in a fast paced life before the Pandemic happened. That’s one way of looking at it, however, like anything else, there’s a downfall to it. With kids spending more time with their parents close enough to always nag them in their every move, it’s only natural that they get into each other’s nerves more.

While every parent’s intention would always be for the best of their children, like what has been mentioned many times earlier, as humans, our natural competitiveness comes out with our children being our lead player. The focus on achieving the right pressure to our children for them to be successful in any matter can easily be transformed to harmful pressure without being mindful.

Without being mindful, examples like these happens:

Children doing their best = Children should be the best
Children learning from mistakes = Children shouldn’t have mistakes

As parents our primary role is to support our children until they’re old enough to be/do on their own certain tasks. Somehow along the way, this support gets mixed up with pressure from parents. The authors gave great examples that made it easier for parents to understand without having the feeling of being told what/how one should do their parenting. This examples have been perfectly described in different behaviours such as Importance, Opportunity, Competition, Perfection, Urgency, Control, and Display.

As you can tell, I can’t get enough of how much I appreciate this great book. Reading it wasn’t only an informative pleasure but really a help in realising how parenting works. With our society nowadays fast evolving, parents can’t rely solely from advice of elders as their parenting ways can be much more different from how things are done in this era. With children also having more access to information, parents would need to keep up with this.

I greatly recommend “The Unlikely Art of Parental Pressure” by Dr. Chris Thurber and Dr. Hendrie Weisinger as it isn’t just an eye-opener but it would make you think and realise of your own parenting ways without being pushy enough telling you to do things. Anyways, learning should never exhaust the mind but done in different ways or fun ways like reading.

This post is a part of Book Marathon 2022 by https://outsetbooks.com