Why is finding time for the family important

Why is finding time for the family important

    It’s not new for us to hear from other parents, or ourselves, unfortunately, how many things we have to do yet don’t have the time for it. Do you experience this too? I’m sure you have, at some point in your life/parenthood.

    No matter what circumstance you’re going through though, finding time for your family, especially if you have your own family already and little ones, is very important. Note that for children, love equals time and time equals love. No matter how little you can give, that would be enough for them.

    I read from an Instagram friend this story where his son tells her that his classmate’s weekly allowance is almost equal, if not even more, compared to his monthly allowance. His story isn’t to complain though, it’s about what his classmate has told him. That he’d rather have the same allowance as his, and have family dinner with his mom and dad, even once a week.

    As much as we adults want to work as much as we can to be able to provide “financially” well for our family, finding the balance of earning and giving time should be included on the top of our list as well.

    Here are ways on how to make sure you make time for your family:

    ESTABLISH PRIORITIES

    This is on the first one on the list as this is where you and your spouse should agree on. It isn’t only you whom your children needs but both of you. Making a conscious decision to prioritize your family on a daily basis is integral. Recognizing the importance of spending time with your loved ones, your children especially and spouse, is a commitment you need to make.

    CREATE A FAMILY CALENDAR

    On our family, this is my phone calendar. It is where my everyone’s schedule is listed as soon as we have the details needed for any event/activity. And since our phones are synced, then my calendar gets to be seen by everyone else as well. haha… You should hear our phones notify us at every corner of our house when we’re all at home.😆

    Other’s also like to hang a calendar on their fridge or at the command center in their home. So, it’s really up to you to see what works for your family. Having a place to see which day/time all of you would be free to do something without forgetting someone or interrupting other’s appointments is important.

    SETTING BOUNDARIES

    Your children would surely still follow your rules so setting boundaries on them is quite easy. It is you and your spouse that needs to be mindful of this. Since the Pandemic where work-from-home has been more of a thing, excessive working has came way more than you thought it would. Working at home despite being at the office the whole day to finish something can easily turn into a bad habit.

    Being a Stay-at-home-mom like myself isn’t saved from this bad habit as well. Being at home all the time doesn’t necessarily mean you’re spending time with your children always either. I bet most of those time, you’re either cooking, cleaning, or well, mindlessly scrolling on your phone?? Let’s be honest, we may be physically there but mentally and emotionally, not.

    So, let’s try to improve on this, shall we? Yes, myself included!

    UNPLUG AND DISCONNECT

    If asked if there’s one thing I missed about those days when I was young, having less technology would be one of them. I’m not anti-technology. Believe me. I love how my Holly, our DEEBOT vacuum maintains our home squeaky clean and I never even swept and mopped our home since we moved-in 16 months ago. What I’m not too happy about was how much distraction these electronic devices and social media had made on all of humanity.

    Being a blogger and in social media as well, I frequently question my use of time while engaging on all this. And take note, this is while I’m being mindful with my actions only. On days where I simply let my day pass by, I don’t even notice the time until I need to rush to make dinner cause my hubby is coming soon.

    INVOLVE YOUR FAMILY IN YOUR ACTIVITIES

    I love the age my daughters are in now. Their currently 8 and 9 years old and old enough to know how a knife can be useful and harmful when handled. This is also the time they are curious enough to learn things in the kitchen and do things by themselves as well. It’s a totally different scenario compared to those times when all you have to do is answer their un-ending whys.Now, I get to let them do and experience things themselves.

    I also like to plan activities where all of us can get involved like volunteering on the “Blockwalk cleaning” by Habitat for Humanity Singapore, where every last Saturday of the month, we go around our block and pick up trash. It’s a great way to teach your children not to throw trash, know that they can help the community, and we get to do a family activity as well. That ticks a lot of boxes, right?! Win-Win, indeed!

    FAMILY RITUALS AND TRADITIONS

    I was raised by my mom who had tons and tons of rituals and traditions followed at every occassion. I actually didn’t noticed this until I had my own family already and gets surprised of my hubby not knowing those things that we do. Apparently, not everyone does them. haha..I swear, I was too naive before, but learned a lot from it.

    One of my favourite traditions though is the one we do every December. Reading the Book of Luke from the Bible from 1st December till Christmas makes our Christmases much more meaningful than simply opening gifts and induldging on a feast.

    DELEGATE AND SHARE RESPONSIBILITIES

    I give all the credit of this to my hubby for being a great role model to my daughters. Seeing and knowing that he’s the dishwasher every evening despite being tired from his office work show the commitment of sharing the responsibility of home chores to our daughters. I firmly believe that this is the reason why despite all the silent growls I begin to hear when it’s time to set the table (chore of my eldest) or cleaning the table after dinner time (chore of our youngest), they still do it.

    And though this chore may not be much, knowing that your family members also share, even a bit of the house chores, makes a big difference. You know this, moms!

    PRIORITIES QUALITY OVER QUANTITY

    It’s normal not to be able to be complete for dinnertime. We all have other responsibilities even if we try our best to make our families our priority. That’s why making sure that you spend quality time is important. Engaging on conversation and asking each other how their day went, connect with each other, tell stories. This is what makes family dinners memorable and important, not the meal itself, actually.

    I remember my daughter telling me one time how she loves dinner time, cause that’s the only time we eat as a complete family.

    COMMUNICATE

    Every member of the family, even your children, should have a voice that is heard.

    I realised and learned this way too well based on experience. Telling my daughter that I’d tuck them earlier at night and they might eat their dinner earlier than usual made her sad. And if I didn’t tried to hear her explanation why, I wouldn’t have made the wrong choice for the sake of something “I think” is for their best.

    You see, it wasn’t that she doesn’t want to sleep early but….(remember QUALITY OVER QUANTITY?) “I remember my daughter telling me one time how she loves dinner time, cause that’s the only time we eat as a complete family.”

    I hope this shed some light on the importance of family time and made you rethink of how you spend your time with your family as well.

    I’d love to hear your stories as well regarding this points that hit you well as a parent or which point you’re also guilty of not being able to do and how you plan to change the habit/improve.

    I could only hope you make deliberate choices and prioritizing your loved ones so you can create a fulfilling family life.

    It’s not new for us to hear from other parents, or ourselves, unfortunately, how many things we have to do yet don’t have the time for it. Do you experience this too? I’m sure you have, at some point in your life/parenthood. No matter what circumstance you’re going through though, finding time for your family,…

    9 Comments

    1. that’s great! Unfortunately, a lot get stuck with that mindset of needing to spend lots of $$$ for them to have a great time with their family especially with their kids not realizing it’s only the time with them that’s most sought of. Trips to the park usually are the best family bonding.

    2. Due to the parent’s busy schedule and even working on weekends, family bondings are rare to find these days. I completely agree with all of your points mentioned above, mostly doing activities together over weekend and to go out, celebrate the festivals together with family is most important and fun

    3. I think family is most important I think if you manage to create that balance, then you can have a healthy family time. I completely agree that digital devices have taken real conversations away
      Finding a balance can restore your mind

    4. I completely resonate with the importance of finding time for family, especially when juggling numerous responsibilities. Children equate love with the time we spend with them, regardless of the amount. It’s heartwarming to hear the story of your Instagram friend’s son valuing family dinners over material possessions. Balancing financial support with quality time should be a priority for parents. Establishing priorities together as a couple and creating a family calendar can be effective strategies to ensure dedicated family time. Thank you for sharing these insights and practical tips!

    5. Togetherness is important, but space for yourself is also important. I think if you manage to create that balance, then you can have a healthy family time. I completely agree that digital devices have taken real conversations away. We spend too much hunched over phones and laptops, we should be going for more picnics and walks, and enjoying our meals together.

    6. I believe that family time is vital for the development and growth of our children. It’s something that we often neglect in this busy world, but carving out moments to just be together as a family is essential. While it may feel like there’s no extra time in the day, I’m sure everyone can find ways to make it happen! Whether it’s a nightly family dinner, game nights or simple conversations before bedtime, spending quality time together is one of the best investments you can make.

      These moments build bonds and allow our children to learn from us and see how we interact with each other. It also gives them an opportunity to be heard, express themselves.

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